There’s a little bit of a riot going on down at The Bell corner NOW!

The Metropolitan Police has hired computer specialists to help it decipher what is being said about the force on the internet.

‘What the Met is looking for is a combination of crisis alerts and management. If someone blogs saying, “There’s a little bit of a riot going on down the street from me,” it will be able to respond that bit faster.’

A Met spokesman said: ‘We are not monitoring in a criminal sense, we are looking to use the sites to get our message out there. We are simply monitoring how we are perceived.

Well, this blog perceives you as a deeply prejudiced and ineffective organisation which colludes with driver criminality and is a willing partner in promoting anti-social behaviour and extreme violence across London. Will that do?