And lo! On the seventh day the worshippers attended St Mary’s Church, Walthamstow. And the Lord said, Thou shalt attend only by car. And there shall be no cycle stands at the House of the Lord.
And the Angel of the Lord said: Thou shalt show thy contempt for global warming by turning up in a Landrover Freelander. And thou shalt attach a bull bar to this Freelander, in order that it may maim or kill child pedestrians or cyclists. And thou shalt display thy contempt for those with a mobility handicap or visual impairment by parking it obstructively on the pavement.
And the Angel said: All who walk or pedal are an abomination unto the Lord, and they shall be cast out into the outer darkness of the London Borough of Waltham Forest, there to suffer the pangs of eternal torment under the Evil One.
If you want to suggest a topic for a sermon (such as 'showing Christian consideration for others') why not email the Rector?
simonheathfield@surefish.co.uk
